Tuesday, December 12, 2006

Cracker Jack

Did ya ever have one of those days? One of those days that just goes on and on, one big bang after another? Well, my friends, today was one of those days. And it certainly ended with a big bang.

Work had been pretty hectic, as is the case when the holidays approach, and people take time off. It becomes time to tie up loose ends, and cram stuff in before everyone heads out for some down time.

But I digress.

Because it was a hectic day, and because we have some entertaining to do this week, I will be missing some exercise classes. I decided to do a different one tonight. I had tried this particular class once before, and it didn't appeal to me. I should have listened to my first instinct which was to not go, but I thought I'd try it again. Give it another shot. Be a good sport.

So I donned my workout gear and headed off to the gym. Now, the outfit that I sported was not one of my favourites. It was never one of my favourites. The leggings had shrunk in the wash, and I felt like a geek with long legs in my water wading spandex. I felt like a Star Trek officer in those pants.

Little did I know that was only the smallest of my problems.

The class was sort of fun, but it wasn't the athletic, full pumping type of exercise that I am used to. Needless to say, I will not be doing this class again. However, there was a follow-on pump class that I had intended to stay for. So, when the first class was over, I started gathering my equipment together to get my place, but then one of my buddies (bless her heart) said the words that everyone dreads hearing.

You have a rip at the back of your pants.

Crap! How could this happen? I didn't feel a draft! There was no funny feeling going on back there. How did this happen?

Now my adrenaline was pumping, and I felt that I was going to throw up.

You see, the rip was about 6 inches long. And, it's not like I could just hide my rip under a t-shirt. It wasn't long enough. And, to make matters worse, I was wearing skimpy underwear underneath!!!! Actually, not much underwear at all. Actually a thongy thingy. Crap! So people didn't just get to look at pretty flowers through the hole! They got to gape at so much more!

Oh man what to do. What to do. So I gathered my water bottle and towel in one hand, and tried to keep the rip closed with the other hand. One hand covering the hole, and walking backwards. oh man. I rushed out of there so fast, called My Sweetie and told him what happened. I was crying, he was killing himself laughing, trying hard not to split a gut over my split pants.

I was so embarrassed. I was mortified. I wanted to crawl under a rock.

Then My Sweetie said 'well come home and show me how bad it is'. Now I really didn't want to show it to anybody. Not even me. When I arrived home, and showed him, he said it wasn't that bad. But it was. I knew it was. Heck it was obvious to the people standing at the back of the room.

I tore the living daylights out of that spandex thing. AND I got rid of some similar pants, other similar leggy things that I always hated...due to the short legs....so they are gone!

Can you guess what I need for Christmas now???

12 comments:

Skittles said...

This is one of those posts like you did before (at a restaurant) where I couldn't help but laugh even though I KNOW you were horrified!!!!

I guess it's always funny when it happens to someone else, eh? (I picked up some Canadian language skills.)

I would have been in TEARS if it had happened to me.

Mike said...

Hmmm, maybe you should have stayed and started your own workout class? You could have charged a bit extra too :)

Mike said...

You could have called it Thong 101 :)

terry said...

it was nice of you to give your classmates a nice show!

thongy thingy... nice...!

instant gratification girl said...

oh my! hehe!
cracker jack? patch 'er crack?
Thank goodness your buddy was there!

HeatherinBeautifulBritishColumbia said...

Giggle, giggle, giggle....sorry, but that really is too funny! I can imagine how you felt and have to tell you how glad I am that it wasn't me...sorry but I have to giggle just a little more....

masgblog said...

you bunch of gigglers!

*I feel a draft*

Skittles said...

Looking for the 12 days... :)

latt├ęgirl said...

Ha ha! More fool you for wearing a thong.

Asara Dragoness said...

Oh noes!! LOL.. I feel terrible for you, though! That is why I do my exercising in the safety and sanctity of my home, where the only people that can laugh at me are my hubby and my kids. Well, not really, but it sounds good, right? :) Actually I exercise at home because I don't have the self-motivation to go to a class regularly, or to a gym. At home, my hubby provides the motivation, i.e. putting in the video and dragging me off the couch to get my workout clothes on. It's working so far! :)

Jeni said...

About 35 years ago and more pounds less than that number too, 2 of my girlfriends and I decided to go horseback riding. As I swung my leg up and over the horse's back, the whole back seam of my slacks ripped out! Luckily we were only about 2-3 miles from my apt. and the girl driving ran me home so I could quickly change slacks. The attendant also held our horses for us till we got back! Good laugh now, embarrassing as all get out then though!

Tisha said...

Bless your heart, I would have been mortified as well...I don't think I could ever go back.