Tuesday, February 13, 2007

You're What? (or the man versus woman perspective)

They say that men and women view things from different perspectives. Women may look at a man's eyes, while men might look at, well, other parts. This certainly came into play recently.

We were at a party, where we knew, pretty much, everyone there. One couple in particular was there, and we had heard through other people about their new boat purchase...brand new...and BIG. This is very big news, for them and everyone who knows them. We like this couple very much, and so we were really excited for them, and eager to discuss the new boat.

MY Sweetie had gone off in one direction to socialize, and I had gone to the she-half of the intended couple. We saw each other, hugged hello, and began talking about the news....of course the new boat. We were discussing how big a change it will be, how nice, what kind, blah blah. Another friend joined up with us to say hello, and greeted the she-half as follows......

'So, hows' Mom doing?' (as she glances to the she-half's tummy).

Confusion set in. What does this have to do with the new boat? Who's Mom? What's she talking about?

After glancing down at the she-half's tummy, I noticed the bulge.

I had no idea. I didn't know what to do. I was stunned. I was so consumed with the boat talk, that I didn't even notice that she was about 4 months pregnant!

Now, I ask you, how does someone NOT notice that someone is 4 months pregnant? I can't fathom how I didn't pick up on that one, especially since later, when speaking with My Sweetie, he said that he immediately noticed her motherly state. But then, he said that he saw her from a distance, and knew from viewing the profile.

This spawned another discussion, about how a man will look at a woman from top to bottom (not THAT bottom!), and form an impression. Women will do something similar, though probably not a full top to bottom glance (heh, we probably stop at THAT bottom!). But, I think that people, in general, don't want to appear rude in giving someone the full look. We do this, but in a you-don't-see-me-doing-this manner.

For me, I think that I was just at the wrong vantage point, but whatever the case, throughout the evening, whenever I would bump into the she-half, I found myself hugging her and saying 'I can't believe it!'.

One thing I did learn, that, the next time this happens, I'll check out the scene from top to bottom......just in case.


Barb said...

Ah, but then you run the risk of congratulating someone who isn't pregnant. (I've done that.)

Don't you think that when guys look at women, they're looking at the woman-without-her-clothes-on? Whereas when women look at other women, it's probably to see what she's wearing, her hair, etc?

Marcia (MeeAugraphie) said...

Skittles said it all for me. And the other day I saw a woman in a store and I truly could not decide if it was pregnancy or otherwise, that just reinforced my caution at saying anything. I'm sure she appreciated your hugs!

Liz Hinds said...

That is the real dread, isn't it? I'm currently keeping an eye on someone or waiting for a word that will give it away - if she is. But I'm pretty sure she's not. Just a little fat round the tum. Says I cuddling my belly!

Liz Hinds said...

And I forgot to say: I didn't know the lady next door was pregnant until her son was three weeks old.

Jeni said...

I've made the mistake a few times of thinking -on first glance -that another woman was "with child" and opened mouth, inserted foot because I was wrong so I try not to make that same mistake again. You could consider yourself lucky in that you were so excited about the boat you didn't notice anything else, in a way, ya know!

JMai said...

That's a cute story. Better to not notice, than to think you noticed and be wrong (a la jeni's comment, above). I'm sure your friend didn't mind!

jeweledrabbit said...

Heehee. When I'm sitting in the bus and a woman with a big belly gets on, but I'm not sure if she's pregnant or just carrying excess weight I never know if I should offer her my seat or not.

jeweledrabbit said...

I posted a link to the movie The Secret in my blog.